Documentary: The Jungle Prescription – Ayahuasca – YouTube

I’m contemplating an Ayhuasca retreat in order to get to the root of my C-PTSD of 50+ years. Continue reading


Mind-Body Connection: Free Resources

National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine (NICABM) offers free mind-body connection resources. Learn brain training for free and get other mind body connection resources.

Source: Mind-Body Connection: Free Resources

Somehow I happened across this resource, apparently from a newsletter subscription and I’d like to pass it around as I think it offers great (free) resources and seminars as to understanding and addressing symptoms in the aftermath of trauma, commonly referred to as post-traumatic stress (PTSD). I myself am not too convinced of prolonged exposure-approaches or those based on CBT/DBT, but as I saw Bessel van der Kolk on the team as well as Dr. Peter Levine as a contributor as well as Dr. Stephen Porges, whose work takes the focus more to the domain of the (autonomous) nervous system (which I think is where trauma responses “live”), I was becoming more interested and so far, I find the information valuable and useful for anyone dealing with PTSD (and/or complex PTSD).

Viewer’s discretion is advised as with all things “exposure”, there’s always a risk of getting triggered.

Huachuma (San Pedro Cactus) — Healing The Spirit And Body –

via Huachuma (San Pedro Cactus) — Healing The Spirit And Body –

It is becoming very evident to me that I have to undergo these sacred treatments using plant medicine, if I want to rid myself of yet-remaining, residual aspects of early and later trauma in my years of childhood and upbringing and with their outcomes wreaking havoc on my psyche – and hence life – to this day. I can almost put my own – cognitive – “fingers” on the places, where I’m still damaged and hurt – but can’t seem to get past those remainders all by myself. I had catalyzing experiences that came close to getting access to those very deeply rooted layers of inflicted pain and resulting damage, but I haven’t managed to resolve them – probably mostly for reasons of not having had an opportunity to integrate the experiences afterwards. By integrating I mean, talking it over with someone who carefully listens and takes an interest in seeing me process my emotions brought to the surface. Since I can’t have access to conventional trauma therapy, it seems the above – along with hopefully getting accepted into a phase III-study on MDMA-assisted psychotherapy in late 2016/2017 – is my only option left. Wish me luck, if so inclined. (I know, I have written about this and said this before… 😉 )

12 Ways Successful People Deal With Toxic People (Trigger Warning!)

12 Ways Successful People Deal With Toxic People.

Wow! One of my Facebook friends – and one of the few I’ve actually once met in real life – just shared this on their wall. In carefully familiarizing myself with these 12 very effective sounding ways of “disengaging” from the impact toxic people can have on your well-being, I immediately realized two things: 1., that much of what I’ve been dealing with throughout my entire life has a lot to do with the fact that unfortunately one of my former caretakers is – or at least was – a very toxic person to the point, where everyone around them is reduced to the part of feeding their disorder. 2. This is going to be my lifeline for the time ahead, where I have no other option but to temporarily move back to the house and people I grew up with/in. I’m going to save you the details of that situation, but let’s just say it’s either that or being homeless. Seeing as I don’t think I have the tools and robustness to actually survive as a homeless person, I have to comply with that option (while trying my best to be grateful, also, in order to make things hopefully go well).

I’d love to be positively surprised and I’m not ruling that option out per se. But having this list of really great sounding devices at hand is definitely going to help navigating those potentially difficult waters ahead. (And *sigh* – just when am I going to get a break again? Yeah, I hear you: I am going to have to make that break for myself. This in itsself will require taking the system on in the country I live in, which is another humunguous bear to wrestle with and which I’ve been wrestling with for the past 8+ years; in my best yoda voice: Carry on I must 😉 ).

The Soothing Vagus: How Our Wandering Nerve Returns Us To Calm –

The Soothing Vagus: How Our Wandering Nerve Returns Us To Calm –

I think, this can be a true life saver for everyone suffering from (C-) PTSD, anxiety, depression. And it doesn’t require medication.

Q&A With An Underground Healer Risking Their Safety To Provide MDMA Therapy –

Q&A With An Underground Healer Risking Their Safety To Provide MDMA Therapy –

I soooo wish, I could call that person and discuss an appointment with her… For my readers suffering from (C-) PTSD, this is a must-read. hope to have MDMA-assisted therapy legalized by 2021.

For the nutshell version of Somatic Experiencing© as developped and applied by Dr. Peter Levine, treat yourself to this:

How Childhood Stress And Trauma Spark Drug Dependence –

How Childhood Stress And Trauma Spark Drug Dependence –

This pill is a bitter one to swallow. Nonetheless – I don’t think there has ever been anyone making as much sense in my world as Dr. Gabor Maté does with his findings. It all puts things in perspective in ways we always felt as being true – but may have not had the lobby to actually voice it. Power to Gabé! He’s spot on.

Tapping The Vein – LSD Psychology & The Structure Of The Unconscious – YouTube

via Tapping The Vein – LSD Psychology & The Structure Of The Unconscious – YouTube.

As it’s becoming more and more obvious that I’m very very unlikely to ever find help in the conventional medical/therapeutic system (for reasons too numerous to detail), I seem to turn to the unconventional and even illegal realm of medicinal treatment in order to get to continue to navigate this earth plane. Because my life got stripped of everything that should make life worthwhile to continue.

So, this “morning” over my usual coffee, I happened upon another interesting article on Amber Lyon’s and found the above linked young man, whose own project called “The True Light of Darkness” is the follow-up of a two-part book about his a) research into and b) sharing of experiences with psilocybin mushrooms and the insights and behavioral modifications gained from that. In the context of this work I came across this video, where he talks about “COEX Systems”, a term coined by Stanislav Grof in his book LSD: Doorway to the Numinous: The Groundbreaking Psychedelic Research into the Realm of the Human Unconscious. Right away it strongly resonated with my own somewhat jiggery introspection into the root cause of my own trauma and strife with ongoing emotional pain that won’t let up one bit so far (despite my very committed efforts and some help from a compassionate therapist).

There are more and more experienced and legitimate researchers and therapists coming out of the closet of conventional in-the-box-thinking in regards to so-called “mental” illness – a misnomer IMO – and their causes and how to address them. Just recently, I linked to a video with Dr. Gabor Maté, who clearly identifies trauma as the root cause of all kinds of addiction according to his experience with thousands of patients he has treated.

As far as I’m concerned, I don’t seem to have other options left as to tap into the realm of psychedelics, most notably psilocybin, in order to continue my own path. Because frankly speaking, it’s come down to either this or …. in the very near future as the pain has become utterly unbearable and conventional options fall away one after another.