Stuck on Lack of Validation

As much as I hate to admit it, but: I’ve never gotten around that roadblock of lack of validation. Hopefully, some of my recent attempts to find help will kick in. One is for a fund allocated to victims of sexual abuse, another one is a doctor practicing in Switzerland and working with psychedelics.

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3 thoughts on “Stuck on Lack of Validation

  1. i hope both possibilities bear fruit for you dear man! ❤

    i've had a change of heart (core beliefs altered) recently about the use of cannabis and hallucinogens and other psychotropic compounds to help mediate specific sources of stress and distress. Personally (speaking for me only): fuck the notion of any cure or medical treatment. I just want access to the same kinds of psychotropic compounds that any of my so-called pre-civilized ancestors took for granted as Life's Bounty freely and abundantly offered forth from Our Mother Earth or from the Great Spirit or the Universe…or from their mother's instructive plant-life narratives or teachings. I want what every self respecting human member of a tribal clan would not merely WANT but take for granted.. No more no less. I want the Corporate-pharma-State-Medical-HumanBody-Dominating-Industrial-Complex to quit fucking with all of us who are suffering needlessly—to quit participating in the sadistic charade which insults our dignity, humanity and intelligence…the Serious Medical Discourse and Dominant Knowledge-Capital-mob mindset which insists that opiate-based compounds, for instance, cannot be used safely, responsibly and with humane and ethical purposes for daily maintenance (and pain management) over a lifetime…or at least until somebody gets their shit together enough to come up with ANY of those illusory, oft-promised "increasingly enhanced interventions" and "improved treatments" for their bullshit classifications of "diseases" and "disorders". I don't need their quaint disease labels and potential treatment plans (that exist only under ideal conditions and to a very privileged few, anyway). I just need pain relief.

    They've turned a simple, straightforward matter of basic self-care and Humane Existence into a Kafkaesque Circus Cum Maximum Security Prison. 🙂

    Mostly, my age (58) has become an increasingly salient context in which i'm making choices (from options socially constructed as Scarce) about my Quality of Life. The shrinking number of years I can imagine remaining (e.g. Ideally) become increasingly precious and deserving of Care and Praxis…to experience, survive, endure, and bear the struggles, torments and suffering of TheRemainingYears, but more importantly to feel Alive and Content and Grateful and Peaceful more often than not or at least as much as possible (given limited options). I've been researching all the physiological, progressive and life-long effects of diverse/specific forms and intensities of stress and domination, …focusing on (a) interrelated/interdependent bio-psycho-social homeostasis-regulating systems and feedback loops (e.g. neuro-endocrine-immune systems and endogenous dopamine/opioid/cannabinoid/etc feedback loops in relation to HPA axis structures and functions.) during (b) different developmental stages (e.g. perinatal, neonatal, early childhood, adolescence, etc) by means of (c)various triggers (e.g. epigenetic alterations, disturbances in nervous system structures and functions, etc,) In other words, my body is deteriorating/aging in ways that do not resemble those of "normal" aging…

    My sacred mission now: 🙂

    1) resist and challenge all human-hating values (e.g. when possible, deconstruct claims that suffering engenders noble wisdom or whatever) and forms of domination
    2) keep *their* hands and laws off my body

    So. I'm with you.

    Let's do this. ❤

  2. Wow, Ruby – if there ever was a manifesto of the suffering mind – this is it! But I say this with respect for your excellent choice of words and phrasing, your most bright analysis and insights – which I concur with, b.t.w. – and the strength of spirit both come from. The war on drugs is yet another scheme that the powers that be chose to shackle the rest of humanity with strife and agony so they can ensure said power over the masses. I say: Their power is nothing. If someone like you, like I, like so many with a similar history, have not only SURVIVED, but PREVAILED – and WITH DIGNITY!!!! – then their power falters in the light of (y)our strength!

    I also think, that the 2-bullet-point-agenda contains all the pragmatics one ever needed. So… press on or rather: Enjoy… and soar on the triumph of having kept your sanity in the face of utter, brutal, cruel, oftentimes humiliating adversity!

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