OK, after having watched this including all the details contained in NDEs and connecting it with previous literature and videos on the subject that I’ve been devouring for the past five, six going on seven years, I no longer have any doubt that I have been suppressing vivid and quite distressful – as in: traumatizing – memories for all my later life, originating from an NDE experience at age 4 when undergoing throat surgery. I must have suffered an immediate and quite powerful flashback from reading an opposing analysis of the Pam Reynolds NDE in October 2009, which resulted in waking up one hour after going to sleep, woken from my own frantic screams of terror and later passing out for sheer shock to the system – which resulted in facial injury and a concussion. I was taken to hospital that night and remember waking up in the morning of the following day, having a distinct feeling of somehow being “emotionally regressed” to age 4 with feelings of major helplessness, isolation, despair. After an oddyssee of several years with trying to get a proper diagnosis and treatment following the demise of my marriage, previous careers and social life, this will hopefully all be helpful information in order to ultimately scout out an expert on the matter with a good track record in treating trauma patients and – get admitted! The health insurance situation is dismal with loopholes making it next to impossible to get access to suitable help on this matter. But since I haven’t given up before and since I seem to have zeroed in on the exact cause of symptoms that have been rendering my life a very rock road, why should I do so now, when previous confusion and doubts are removed from the appropriate trajectory? In this context: Thanks to all of you who have expressed sympathy, who kept encouraging me and cheered me on! Your support was often times crucial in finding the courage and willpower to move on, when there seemed to be absolutely no solution or improvement anywhere in sight!
I will require lots of perseverance and patience for need of chipping away at the administrative and bureaucratic obstacles thrown in my way. Wish me luck! The good part is: The confusion and doubts about the “just wtf exactly went wrong?” are completely gone!